I'll Be Watching You
by Melora Maxwell
Summary: ONE-SHOT: In A.C. 196, the relationship between two of the pilots has gone downhill with the brakes off. May not be the boys you automatically think of... :YAOI:


A/N: Inspired after I downloaded 'I'll Be Watching You', it's a lil' fic I came up with on the spur of the moment. Hope you like!

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Disclaimer: I don't own, and never will own any of the GW boys. I also don't own the song 'I'll Be Watching You' by Sting and The Police.

Warnings: Slight lime content, BIG dose of angst. 

Key: Italics denote song lyrics

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**I'll Be Watching You**

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_Every breath you take  
And every move you make  
Every bond you break  
Every step you take  
I'll be watching you..._

* * *

You look so peaceful lying there across from me, under that battered blanket.

The dreams aren't haunting you tonight; they can't hurt you where you rest. You've worn that mask for so long, people can no longer separate the truth from the fiction. Only the others understand that, and me the best of all. It took a long time to break that mask. You were so frightened when it fell, the facade you had crafted shattering around your feet.

I remember how much you raged at me, the one who had finally found your weakness.

And your weakness was me.

* * *

_Every single day  
And every word you say  
Every game you play  
Every night you stay  
I'll be watching you..._

* * *

A shadow flickers across your face. I'm ready for the inevitable.

Sure enough, the tears come. Knowing all I can ever do for you is hold you close until the grief passes, it hurts. I'm not even sure you know how much it hurts.

You lie in my arms, salt rivulets silently trickling down your face. I pull you close until you lie curled against me, head buried in my chest, my vague words of comfort ringing in your ears. I stroke your hair, knowing how that while it may do little to soothe your pain, I grow strong from it. Your tears slow after a while, you reach up to my face and gaze into my eyes. It takes a lot not to flinch at the grief I see in their depths. Those dark windows to the soul close as our lips meet, warm and soft, with a grace I rarely experience.

But it's not like it will ever last. 

* * *

_Oh can't you see?  
You belong to me  
How my poor heart aches  
With every step you take..._

* * *

Maybe I'm just being paranoid.

You cling to me as if I'm your lifeline, as if I'm the only one capable of reaching your soul in whatever hell it dwells in. You pull my body on top of yours, seeking the solidity and comfort it offers you so freely. I hold you close, slowly prising you free of your clothes until you lie against me, naked and trembling with pain and need. The tears flow. You barely notice me preparing you until I take you completely.

The pain of me inside you is nothing compared to the sheer torment you are experiencing in your heart. 

* * *

_Every move you make  
And every vow you break  
Every smile you fake  
Every claim you stake  
I'll be watching you..._

* * *

Nearly a year now, and you've grown and changed so much.

You come into our room and simply look at me. I'm getting better at reading those glances. But this one...it seems as if you are grieving once again. You move away from our bed and pull open the dresser, piling clothes into a holdall. I'm frozen as you continue to pack, helpless to stop you, to cry out, too afraid and in awe of you to even make a sound.

I know what's happening.

You've moved on.

I stare at the foot of the bed. The clink of metal on wood hits my senses as the door slams shut. 

* * *

_Since you've gone  
I've been lost without a trace  
I dream at night I can only see your face  
I look around, but it's you I can't replace  
I feel so cold and I long for your embrace  
I keep on crying baby, baby please..._

* * *

The ring of eternity I had chosen for you. You had been ecstatic when I had presented it to you. It had been so hard to tell you I cared, even harder to show how much. It had seemed like the perfect gift for you. In the darkness of this night, I slip it onto my finger, just as slender and strong as yours. The black sapphire in the center of the ring shimmers in the light of the moon. The sharp lines of the cut gem reflect the cuts through my own heart.

The tears come and I have no inclination to stop them. 

* * *

_Oh can't you see?  
You belong to me  
How my poor heart aches  
With every step you take..._

* * *

That's all I ever was to you, wasn't it? Someone to use, to take away the pain. But how could I ever take away your pain, when you caused me so much in return?

That first time I ever laid eyes on you, an enigma of a boy, shaped so much by your rage and your pain...I was captivated. I wanted you so much...

You used me like a toy, a mere plaything. And how can you ever explain to the one who abused you that you love them so entirely? Every time you achieved a victory over the grief, you moved further away from me.

Your happiness, my pain. 

* * *

_Every move you make  
And every vow you break  
Every smile you fake  
Every claim you stake  
I'll be watching you..._

* * *

I guess you're happy now you're with her. She provided some sort of comfort to you in the wars, something you apparently can't find with me.

She looks so happy with you by her side, like she's complete in some way.

But you...your eyes have always let you down. There's something there...something I can't help but want.

Do you miss me even half as much as I miss you? I can be pretty silent when I need to be, and there's never been a time to be stealthier. I can't stop watching you. It's like...I need to watch you. I want to watch you. I want you. I love you. 

* * *

_Every move you make  
Every step you take  
I'll be watching you..._

* * *

She just called me. This is getting too weird.

She said that you and she had never been together, not during the wars, not while you needed me. You're on your way back to me now. I can see how much it hurts her, she's grown so fond of you, you're like a brother to her. But any resentment I bear towards her evaporates with that message. It cost her a lot to tell me that; I can't dislike her any longer.

She broke her heart for my happiness. That's a debt I swear I will repay. 

* * *

_I'll be watching you..._

* * *

You had to grow up so fast during the war. The person I see before me, holdall in hand, is a man in body, but you're nothing more than a child inside. The tears in your eyes shimmer in the light as you drop your bag on the floor, falling to your knees and sobbing softly.

The world grows blurred as my own tears fall and I fall beside you, holding you tight. For a few moments, all that can be heard is the sound of two tear-choked voices finding comfort in each other. I missed you so much, and you hurt me so badly, but I can't help my feelings. I've watched you for over two years, everything you did, nearly every waking moment accounted for. No matter what you did, I always loved you for it. 

The sobs die down as you sit in my arms. Have you really missed me that much? You wipe the salt tracks from your face and look unwaveringly into my eyes. You fight to speak round the tears, I know this is costing you a lot of determination.

'I...I'm sorry. For everything. Anything I did to hurt you...I'm so sorry...' 

* * *

_Every breath you take  
Every move you make  
Every bond you break  
Every smile you fake  
Every single day  
Every word you say  
Everything you make  
Every night you stay  
Every move you make  
Every vow you break  
Every smile you fake  
Everything you make_

* * *

That choked apology means more to me than you could ever hope to understand. I hold you in my arms and stroke your hair. It's been so long since I could do that. Unconditional love that you and I can finally accept.

'Everything you did, anything whatsoever, I never left you. I never stopped watching you. I'm Shinigami after all. I'll always watch you. From now until forever, I'll watch over you.' 

* * *

_I'll be watching you..._

* * *

'Now until forever, my Heero.' 

I'll be watching you. 

And I'll love you. 

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END


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